Dear Cinta

Heart trying hard :

Dear Cinta,

    If I ever push you away,

    I don't really mean to.

    When I tell you I don't want to talk about it,

    I do, I am just looking for the right words.

    Give me a minute, and if I can tell you; I will.

    I try to be a struggling mix of real and perfect at the same time.

    At the moment, 

    I am working on the ratio.

    When I get really quiet sometimes it is because I have too much to say

    I have thought of too many things to tell you at once

    and I don't know what to say first.

    I get immaturely jealous of anyone who gets to see you on daily basis.

    I miss you very easily,

    But I also like that we can be apart and we are both okay.

    Space is good, too.

    I love the way we love some of the same things,

    And I love how we love entirely different things.

    My head is a complicated pile of thoughts,

    and fears, and craving, and dreams,

    and this tangled up nostalgia for the past and, somehow, the future.

    I am flawed and I am human and I am broken and I am trying,

    and I am one person and I am two hands and I am one heart.

    and I love you,
    and I am so glad you are here.

                                                                                                                                        Sincerely,
                                                                                                                                        Bulan