Friday, September 21, 2012

Undeleted Memories 'Reez'

Heart controlling:

FORCE it Enny!!! Mend your heart, let it bipping thru yourself, thru your steps, thru your mind. The determination its unspeakable beneath your skin. What is this? Perlu ke you macam ni?

If dia tau I jadi begini, sure the whole group takkan lepaskan I dengan pilihan sendiri if this the hardest way I chose for the past 10 years ago. I can't be your so perfect polished girl. I chose to create my own life even we know it's gonna be harsh, cruel, hurt to me...but you guys have to leave me, let me bare with it. I know I can be stronger than you expected. Guys, it's not that I didn't know that most of you guys already back here in Malaysia after for a long time sulking of my stupid decision of letting this go. If Reez can believe me, you guys need to believe me too. He know why I chose this. I can reshape this. Yes its gonna be hard but let it be.

Being heartbroken it just part of it but the ugly truth my heart still beeping because of someone. Someone that left without any sound of sadness but full trust on me. Separuh jiwa I adalah kekuatan you Reez. Kala my alter ego trying to destroy my other half, that strength gave a full hope to console it. 

I lupa janji2 tu? NO! Never! To be frank, all those memories never been deleted from my lil heart. How protective you guys are, how frustrated you guys can be when I chose this. All of us have 'the letter' from Reez right. I doesn't ask you guys to come back to rescue me as I doesn't need that. All I need is your doa'. Doakan I sehat, doakan I bahagia. Its more than enough. 

Maafkan Enny, Reez. Maafkan Enny dah lama tak singgah pusara Reez, papa and Abg Fir. Enny tak kuat. Setiap kali berada berdekatan, my heart beeping like no one business. Maybe I'm just scared or my heart just still strong for you. Berpuluh kali Enny cuba. But now Reez, I really wanna see you. Biar pun Reez xdgr, but you will be hearing me somewhere kan. Please be my strength again Reez. :'(  Enny rasa sakit tu datang balik, am I strong enough to get through this alone again?.. Ya Allah!

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